mind confusion

Its been long I have been writing eh?
well.. I guess I gotta come up with an excuz or els :P(can't b bodard!!_-)!
SORZ AMY that i told u to ryt n i eventually neva did..T_T!!

well..

i was sick yesterday....
because probably in the weekends i ate foods crying.
That things happen to me often.
Family conflict , you know you starts to mind evrythin then you're about to cry and swallow the food but then my digestive system never allows any food when my mind is seriously at sensitive circumstances....

well...
as the result I tried goin skool on monday though I didn't get much of it.. nd had to stay home nd eat this yukky lil watery soup T_T... thin(fr mum.. it wasn dat bad tho...) and be by MYSELF!!

I still do and have always been!!
h8in bein alone!!
wherever or whenever.. i kno that i sleep by myself(not with dolls or my cat besides me no more) but dats becuz i kno there are peepz in the hous....

lol

I HATE BEING ALONE!!

thats Y i had call mum several times like a mama's GIRL

lol...


n e ways... I wasn't going to talk about this ...
and the story goes on..

You kno wat these day , ami nd tasho??

I totally feel isolated
I understand the fact that I am the one who hangs around with the J.J and R more often than you thesedays
But I STILL WANNA TALK TO YOU>.<
the only reason me wif R mor often'z bcuz shez in EVRY SUBJCT AS me.. n JJ I don hang around wif her dat much...(exp dat she lives Bhyn ma House)

nd..

you kno..

i dunno~!!!


i am so confused ... i sort of feel.. lets say..

'pissd' ,'sad', 'not so happy', but in a way 'alrite', being still 'close'

take the saturday and u n C 4 e.g. -_-!!(i really dont wanna fite or hav another conflict/argument over this though)

I wasn't evn going to go bCuz I had no money

nd when I said if I could go you said I could go but your reactions didn seem like that,
that made feel you kno... isolated

phew.... idk how to say this but I still want to be a friend who can listen and talk at the same time

and I understand the fact that I am loud, annoying physically but thats how I have been living all my life. and I eventually I do not want to change how I have been living becuz........ if I change the way I live.. I mite fall into depression and blablablabla

its a lame excuse.. but please kno that I DO KNO when to stop and wher to stop


O god... i hop this doesnot end up with another conflict i've been having in the weekends..
:P~ i'll ryt next tyem